Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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