Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
Randomize
