Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Randomize
