He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
