do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
