areolas are like halos for boobs.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Randomize
