Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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