I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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