Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Randomize