if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Holy sore nipples Batman
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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