I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
It was confusing and full of hummus
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
