he puts the penis in happiness.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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