Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Randomize