A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
