Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
