whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Randomize
