dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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