just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Randomize