I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
i out mim tonsoeep
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
