just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Randomize
