She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
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