woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
My vagina just clenched in fear
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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