it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
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