Whod you bang
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
