It's Friday. Sex?
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
