one two three fourrrrnication!
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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