dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
