We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
