Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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