im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Randomize
