I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
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