love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Randomize
