she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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