I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
It's just like the Real World with babies
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
