so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
