I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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