spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
