but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
