it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
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