Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
sex in a hospital.. check
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Randomize