Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
Randomize
