he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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