I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize
