is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
The uberlube is also flammable
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize