This girl is more easily done than said...
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
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