At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
