5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Randomize
