i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
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