1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
