Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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