I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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